Tuesday, August 11, 2009

when a loved one is gone...

My best friend lost her father recently. Last week, I lost a near and dear aunt. It is an extremely painful experience and hits you like a rapid hurricane. However prepared one is for the death to come in, it is still a very traumatic experience! With the sudden experience it comes as an upsetting shock. It becomes absolutely unbelievable and denial for quite some time.
We hear from the closest ones that they prefer to die than to live with the loss that is irreplaceable. However it comes as a realization that life has to go on. These are a few things that could help you while you are on your most unpleasant experience.
1. Cry: it is OK to Cry and sometimes healthy too. Please take time out to grieve. This is important because if the person does not take time to grieve, there are chances that the pain is carried throughout life causing physical illness and depression. Whether you want to cry on someone’s shoulder or be by yourself, do take time for this. one needs to understand that this would take time and popularly said, it is indeed the best healer.
2. Be available: Offer your support inconspicuously. While also making it very clear you’re there to help in whatever ways you’re most needed. Physical and emotional touch can bring great comfort. Whenever it seems appropriate, give a hug or extend a handclasp. Throughout the year, remember birthdays, anniversaries, days that have important meaning for the bereaved and offer your renewed support during those times. Be understanding.
3. Help: Help them with their daily household tasks, cooking meals, keeping the house clean, any other mundane activities. Practical help will go along way in helping with coping death.

Take care!

Pics courtesy: Google